I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
