you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
