I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I forget how to act sober
Randomize