Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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