It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
