Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
