Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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