Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
