So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Randomize
