He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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