GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
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