Soap is not a condiment
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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