In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
so much tequila, so little girl.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
