Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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