? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
