let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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