I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
My hand turned me down
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
