it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
