she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Randomize
