Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
