i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Randomize
