end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
