How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.