Texts From Last Night

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  (805): View more from California

  IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!

  (818): View more from California

  A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?

  (805): View more from California

  CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT

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  (805): IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT! (818): A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie? (805): CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT http://tfl.nu/znee
  Replies (21) Good night (5434) Bad night (914)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.

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  (541): its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again. http://tfl.nu/0bz7
  Replies (10) Good night (4406) Bad night (1114)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat

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  (816): you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat http://tfl.nu/j8dy
  Replies (20) Good night (5295) Bad night (792)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.

  (786): View more from Florida

  How high are you right now..

  (305): View more from Florida

  I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.

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  (305): Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind. (786): How high are you right now.. (305): I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT. http://tfl.nu/q5i7
  Replies (29) Good night (10376) Bad night (1141)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit

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  (973): i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit http://tfl.nu/ux8z
  Replies (18) Good night (3900) Bad night (1529)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.

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  (412): i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad. http://tfl.nu/1j3o
  Replies (3) Good night (3339) Bad night (1079)
• Favorite

  (779): View more from Illinois

  We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..

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  (779): We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time.. http://tfl.nu/hdfa
  Replies (2) Good night (2182) Bad night (867)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard

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  (805): we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard http://tfl.nu/fmkh
  Replies (4) Good night (1763) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.

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  (618): His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark. http://tfl.nu/bjsg
  Replies (9) Good night (1164) Bad night (1324)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.

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  (443): Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face. http://tfl.nu/p4qr
  Replies (5) Good night (1229) Bad night (387)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape

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  (250): im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape http://tfl.nu/bk86
  Replies (1) Good night (759) Bad night (951)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?

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  (727): I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening? http://tfl.nu/i8s4
  Replies (8) Good night (1136) Bad night (713)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.

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  (513): My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck. http://tfl.nu/0395
  Replies (3) Good night (772) Bad night (245)
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  (447): View more from

  She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.

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  (447): She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases. http://tfl.nu/jvs6
  Replies (5) Good night (247) Bad night (528)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?

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  (570): Can I use your baby to go shoplifting? http://tfl.nu/mon8
  Replies (3) Good night (332) Bad night (781)

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