How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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