Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
