hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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