More tranny stories later!
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
