This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Randomize
