I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
