I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
