What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
