Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize
