She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
