Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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