I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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