do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
