there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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