Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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