what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
