I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Randomize