I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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