So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
