apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
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