you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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