you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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