Swine flu is the new snow day.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
