i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
