he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
