There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
