I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
