did you get engaged???
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
